Sure. No...I mean, yeah...my teaching is totally transformational.

I teach COMP. I think it makes me human.

Though I tell students to be things:

• a fertile plain in need of seed

• a fruit tree and an evergreen

• a woodpecker

• a flightless, featherless bird

• a hairless cat (a sphynx)

• a puzzle and its pieces (with any image except cats)

• a hurricane with a one-syllable name

• a blown-out fighter plane

• a graffitied boxcar on a freight train (with a small amount of hay inside)

• one drop of cold rain

• a shoe sole, then laces (with special attention to the aglet)

• a tongue, lips (no gloss or stick)

• a punctuation mark (pick your mark, I am not a tyrant)

• a Sears Polaroid camera with flashbar (this requires a mini-lecture w/slides)

• a length of string, then a spool

• a pair of scissors and clear glue

• a household basics toolkit

• a gas, a liquid, plasma (almost anything they can recall from the periodic table)

• a straw

• a table, a chair

• several coffee table items: cigarette. ashtray, lamp (with attention to the base, shade, and bulb)

• a plug in search of an outlet

• an amoeba (or any cell)

• a planet

• a single pair of underwear

• a suspension bridge

• a white flag

• an iced cake (both before and after party)

• one sperm and the placenta

• and, of course, the proverbial fly on the wall (with special attention to compound eyes)

Yes, I am permitted to jump on the trampoline of cliché and yes, I do require students to be the trampoline.

Though there are a few things I discourage:

• snowflakes

• unicorns and rainbows

• eye patches

• weapons

• iAnythings

• books, pencils, and paper (just bring, don't be)

• money

• masks

• needles

• trophies

• pillows (any kind of bedding, really)

• dreams

• lockets, rings, tiaras (anything begemmed)

• genitalia (though I always qualify this with "If you find that genitalia is an itch you must scratch, please come talk to me about process and approach.")

Usually, someone asks about being a dog or dinosaur and I have to remind them dogs and dinosaurs, while not human, are indeed mammals so we might be straying a little too far from the characteristics of the genre without real justification for doing so. (No one ever questions whether dinosaurs were actually mammals, so until they do, I will continue with my rote response.)

I offer some consolation by instructing students to be a fingerprint, i.e. (yes, i.e. not e.g.):

Please be the fingerprint on the doorknob. Or bathroom mirror.